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BITCHES LOVE STONES

BITCHES LOVE STONES

$30 or $25 each when you grab 2

Rated 4.9/5 by 715 Customers

Broken-in comfort from day one
Print that won't crack or fade
Gets softer every wash
ColorWhite
Size

Size Guide

Measure your body and match to the chart below.

SizeChestWaistHip
S34–36"27–29"35–37"
M38–40"31–33"39–41"
L42–44"35–37"43–45"
XL46–48"39–41"47–49"
2XL50–52"43–45"51–53"
3XL54–56"47–49"55–57"

How to Measure

  • Chest: Around the fullest part of your chest, tape parallel to the floor.
  • Waist: Around your natural waistline, tape comfortably loose.
  • Hip: Around the fullest part of your hips, ~8" below your waist.

These are unisex tees on Comfort Colors blanks and run true to size. Size up for a looser fit.

ShipsTue, Jun 16
🇺🇸 Fast US Shipping
Mix & Match
Fast Shipping Made to order in the USA
30-Day Guarantee Love it or return it
Comfort Colors® fits true to size with a relaxed, lived-in feel. If you're between sizes or like a looser fit, go up one. Check the size guide for exact measurements.
Orders ship within 2–3 days. Standard delivery takes 3–5 business days from there. You'll get a tracking number as soon as it's on its way.
Yes — the bundle discount applies to everything in the store. The builder above lets you grab 2 or 3 of this design in different colors and sizes. For different designs, just add each shirt to your cart separately and the bundle pricing applies automatically.

Sophie ,Allison and 8000+ others love our shirts!

Product Description

About This Design

This funny graphic tee features a gorgeous watercolor-style rockhopper penguin, painted with the kind of care usually reserved for serious wildlife art — except this little guy is on a mission. He's clutching a pebble in his beak, doing exactly what real penguins do to woo a mate, but the text makes sure you know exactly what kind of energy he's bringing to the courtship. It's the vintage graphic tee vibe meets nature documentary, and it absolutely should not work as well as it does.

Why You'll Love This Shirt

This animal shirt earns a genuine double-take — people will lean in to read it, laugh out loud, and immediately ask where you got it. It's the kind of funny tee that lives rent-free in someone's head for days. Printed on a Comfort Colors heavyweight cotton unisex tee, it's soft, relaxed, and built to be a go-to shirt that somehow gets funnier every time you wear it.

Perfect For

This is the sarcastic shirt you buy for the friend who watches nature documentaries ironically and has strong opinions about penguins. It pulls double duty as a halloween tee, a birthday gift, or just a random Tuesday surprise for a partner who will absolutely lose it over the reference. If you know someone who loves wildlife, memes, and a little crude humor thrown into the mix, this sarcastic tshirt is already their favorite thing they don't own yet.

Premium Quality Details

  • Comfort Colors 1717 garment-dyed heavyweight tee
  • 100% ring-spun cotton that gets softer with every wash
  • Relaxed unisex fit, runs true to size
  • Available in multiple colors, sizes S-3XL
  • Printed with high-quality DTG (direct-to-garment) printing
Quality & Feel

This is not a cheap feeling tee. Printed on a premium Comfort Colors® shirt, this tee perfectly drapes on you, with a relaxed streetwear-style look.

• Heavyweight, garment-dyed Comfort Colors 1717
• Vintage DTG-print feel, crack-resistant
• Unisex fit, true to size
• Designed by TeeHeeUSCo

Shipping & Returns
  • Free standard shipping on orders $75+
  • 30-day returns/exchanges if you're not in love with your shirt. Learn more.

Us vs. The Other Guys

See why thousands are making the switch

Fan Favorite
TeeHeeUSCo
Comfort
Premium Comfort Colors cotton that stays soft wash after wash
Designs
Hand-designed by professional artists — actually funny
Guarantee
Guaranteed reactions or your money back
Colors
20+ colors to match your vibe
Community
8,000+ happy degenerates and counting
Generic Tee Brands
Comfort
Thin, scratchy fabric you'll never want to wear again
Designs
Clip art from 2003 that nobody laughs at
Guarantee
Good luck navigating their return policy
Colors
Black or white — take it or leave it
Community
Tumbleweeds and unanswered support tickets
Rated 4.94/5 by 8,000+ happy customers

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Join 8000+ Degenerates and Counting

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"Wore it out running errands and received 2 compliments and lots of laughs. I fuhreaking love this shirt and couldn't be happier" - Hannah

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